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How to Write Your Own Vows: Our Quick Guide with Video Examples

Updated: Jun 4, 2023

Crafting your own wedding vows is a powerful way to share exactly how you feel about the love of your life.

Deciding to write your wedding vows is a powerful way to share exactly how you feel about the love of your life, and create a real ceremony moment.
Wedding Cermony & Vow Exchange

As wedding videographers, we are always looking for moments. Those once-in-a-lifetime flashes that paint the picture of the day. And if you’ve chosen to write your own wedding vows, you have one of those magical moments within your grasp.

Whether the vows you choose to write are heartfelt, hilarious, or somewhere in-between. In our experience, couples who craft their own ceremony words invariably create an exceptional moment.

However, the task of writing vows can be an overwhelming one. Where the heck do you even start? What should you talk about? These worries and more can force you into wondering whether it’s all worth it. Well, we’re here to say it certainly is.

Beyond any moment making, original vows will gift your ceremony a serenely intimate feel. While also helping to show your loved ones just how you feel about your partner. Plus, your spouse will adore hearing you speak from the heart about them.

If you’re still on the fence, or worried about sitting down to write your vows, don’t panic. We’ve put a simple, and quick guide that’ll help you craft the perfect prose for your special day.

How Long Should Your Wedding Vows Be?

The art of public speaking, is knowing how long you should be speaking for. Not long enough, and you won’t get your point across. Too long, and people start to nod off… If you’re in the midst of writing your wedding speech, on top of your vows, you’ll know this already.

We would suggest short and sweet is best for vows. Between 1 and 3 minutes. That amount of time should be enough to share just how you feel, without it feeling like an epic monologue. If you feel that you can succinctly sum everything up in under 1 minute, that’s also fine. But be sure to not make it feel like you rushed through your vows.

Can You Deliver Wedding Vows in Private?

When you write your own vows, it can seem strange to then deliver these deeply personal words in front of a room full of people. So it totally makes sense if you’d prefer to say them privately.

The choice of where and when you share vows with each other is totally up to you. It can be done at any point during the morning, or even the day before.

How to Write Your Own Wedding Vows

When using traditional wedding vows, there is a time-honoured structure that must be followed. When you write your own wedding vows, you’re granted a lot more freedom. However, it’s good to create an outline, and then write around that.

Tell Your Partner How You Feel

These are your wedding vows, so tell your partner you love them! Be a little sappy, a little gushing about the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Bride and Groom exchanging vows during ceremony
Romantic Wedding Vows

Share a Story that Illustrates Your Love

Think about a moment in time that displayed what a good partnership you had. Or how funny your spouse is, or genuine. Tell a story, or two, that’ll sum up just why this person is the one for you.

Make Some Promises

These are vows at the end of the day, and that’s just a fancy word for a promise, or commitment. How exactly do you envision your future together? What can you vow today that’ll serve you well in the future?

Think about the lows you may have experienced on your journey together, and let those inspire the positive ways you can make the rest of your story even better.

Involve Loved Ones in Your Vows

Unless you’ve decided to exchange vows privately, there is a room full of guests in front of you who are all invested in your continued happiness. Therefore, they should know that’ll you’ll need them just as much going forward, if this marriage is to be a success.

Involve certain members of your family and friends in your vows by sharing, for example, how their support has always helped you through. And how you, in the future, will promise to do the same for them.

Video Examples of Real Wedding Vows

If you struggle to write your own wedding vows, it’s good to see some real examples. That way, you can properly gauge the tone of your own words, and get inspiration when you’re feeling stuck.

As wedding videographers in Ireland, we’ve been blessed with the opportunity to witness many beautiful vows being exchanged. Here are a couple of particularly wonderful moments that, we feel, could help you write your own vows.

Hopefully, we have inspired you to write your own wedding vows. It would be a pleasure to help you further, and actually record the moment for you! We are wedding photographers and videographers in Dublin, Ireland, with a vast amount of experience in capturing personalised ceremonies. We are always fully prepared with professional audio devices, cameras, and lighting to make sure your vows sound, and look perfect.

If you would like to browse some of our real weddings, please take a look at our portfolio. And if you would like to see what’s included in our wedding packages, visit our offer page, or contact us directly.

For all other inquiries please email us at:

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